Pissed Off Pastor

John 19:41

As he came near and saw the city, he wept over it, saying, if you, even you, had only recognized on this day the things that make for peace! 

I’m pissed off and angry. It seems that we can’t do anything anymore in our nation. We can’t solve problems. We continue to let ourselves be brainwashed that there is nothing we can accomplish because we are so divided. I say bullshit. We are not divided by some cosmic divine entity that just won’t let us come together to accomplish something for the good of everyone. Every faith practice calls us towards a different way, towards unity and care for all. I proclaim there is a better way, and that way begins with me.

I’m reminded that we teach our children to make good choices. We are choosing to let ourselves be divided. We are choosing to let our anger turn to hate for anyone who disagrees with us. We are choosing to respond to hate with hate, anger with anger and vile speech with vile speech.

There must be a better way and it must begin with me.

I have said for many years now that finding the good in the world is a spiritual exercise, lest our hearts be ruined. It is even more important today to search out those who are putting good into the world.

Yes, they are here.

Even today there are people expressing publicly all our anger and frustration. Imploring the leaders to listen for the good of all. Even today there are people praying publicly. Even today there are people trying to find a way forward. Even today there are churches opening their doors for people to gather. Even today there are people holding space with the victims and doing the most difficult, good work of helping the community in Texas heal. Yes. Even in the midst of this horrific shooting there is love.

There is a time for anger and frustration because of our collective inaction in the wake of senseless and useless death. There is a season for everything, and in every season is a time of rebirth. Within this better way is a decision. Who are we going to be in the world? Healers or haters? Speakers of love or screamers of violence? Angry, forever? Or are we going to sit in this current season of anguish only to rise up stronger in our commitment to being goodness in a hurting world? The better way begins in our own hearts and souls. If we allow it the goodness can infect our spirit just as much as the other aspects of life that are ruinous.

Jesus Weeps!

I’m saddened to know that the trauma will not affect just the families of the 22, the latest count as of this writing, families. It’s hard to calculate how many will be affected by the senseless shooting of children and teachers while at school. But safe to say the real trauma will affect hundreds, even thousands in that community directly. And if we think that all children, families, and schools are not traumatized from this news that is becoming all too familiar in our country, we are not spiritually tuned in.

This latest tragedy touches each and every one of us. Not politically. Spiritually in our souls, collectively.

Some of us may feel lost, or pissed, or angry, or sad, or depressed, or worried, or all the above and more. In these times when our hearts are wrenched open so violently, we can only Lament as a way of releasing the toxins of despair. Lament is the time when our spirit feels as if no one is listening. No one, but God.

We can hear this in the book of Lamentations, ‘My eyes will flow without ceasing, without respite, until the Lord of heaven looks down and sees. 

In the weeping, in the lamenting, God is listening. Even weeping with us at the loss of life.

Maybe the way forward, or the first step, is to care. Maybe that’s the first step towards getting up after our season of lament. Maybe caring for our family and friends is a small way of putting good into the world.

So, share some care today.

Share some love in your family or community

Call someone who you know you can trust and lament together

Listen to each other’s pain

Say thank you a bit more today

Say I love you a few more times today

Write down you anger and let it out

Cry onto the paper of your lament

Get outside if you can and breathe

Care for your own soul

Put the goodness of your soul into the world

So that the world can begin to heal

Find quiet time

Rest

It is OK.

Rest so as to rise in goodness

I need you and you need me

We need each other

Rest so as to rise in goodness, together.